Indeed, I was judged

(By- Avni Panwar)

“Indeed, I was judged” they are such strong words and hit us with a splash of a sense of awakening like some kind of a fresh alive feelings, like the first breath you inhale from freshly blossomed sunflowers or just the thought of it brings in such a passionate feeling…

Being able to do what we want, what we desire, being able to pen down our actual deep feelings, to speak what we wish to or just able to do what we want to without worrying about a thing. All these things make us alive.

Yet, what might you do when every one of these things are detracted from you. The main thing you’re left with is promise for that Someday.

Until then my dreams are my only place; My Freedom, My liberation, My Gateway from this harsh world and set rules. Till that someday arrives my dreams are my only priority.

 

Lethargic and sleepy with no strength at all,

Wake up at eight even though I didn’t sleep at all,

Rushed down the stairs like a cannonball,

Saw the elongated faces as I went in haste.

Yes, I was judged for waking up late.

Pointing out on how much milk i pour in my cereal or how many bread i eat,

What I eat,

How I eat,

And when I eat

Yes, I was judged for the way I eat.

But I had an appetite to keep.

Told to sit up straight

“Be ladylike”, mother said.

Eat less so I don’t gain weight

“Keep your tummy half empty”, mother said.

Sat down as it was time to play

Help me with the chorus, mother said.

Learn to stitch and how to bake

About time you start acting like a lady at your age.

Yes, I was judged for wanting to play.

Finally, a time when I can slay

Came in night with sweet dreams as my gateway

Weighed down by the deemed expectations

I went to bed as I had yet another day…